How Not to Ask a Girl to Homecoming: Dress up Like a Bush and Show up at Their House

Dress up like a bush and show up at her house unannounced at night.

It seemed like a good idea at the time, okay? This still makes for one of my favorite rejection stories. It was October 31 and some friends and I were out trick-or-treating. My expert costume design scheme had me wrapped up in 40 feet of camo netting, and I’d crouch on people’s doorsteps and pretend to be a bush. Or just a guy wrapped in camo netting.

We just happened to be in the neighborhood of the young lady I was considering asking to homecoming that year. So when we got to her house, I was crouching on the porch, and she came to the door. She thought I was on one knee, like a legit proposal. I stuttered out a somewhat confident proposition, unaware that it looked like I was trying to propose. That’s really not my style; it’s homecoming, not a wedding.

She was not only surprised, but confused and speechless.

She ended up throwing candy at us until we went away.

Showing up unannounced is usually a bad idea.

Also don’t show up in a terrible costume….yeah

Learn and laugh from my experiences, Homecoming is right around the corner. January 17, 2014.